About Me

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I'm 23 now; In the BDSM lifestyle for four- almost five years now. I am a 24/7 slave with a wonderful Daddy/fiancee: who is artcomet.blogspot.com. But as you will see in this blog are the emotions that I go through each and every day- in and out of the lifestyle. This is to show how much I've grown and bonded with my Daddy, how I've dealt with 'the world", and how I dealt with people in the BDSM lifestyle; Enjoy.

March 8, 2010

Whats on my mind right now

Well like the title said is whats going on right now in my life. Its getting crazy. I got a good thing from God and now im having a bad thing come faster than that. I finally got my meds. YAY on that but now the uncle i live with is being an asshole. He plays these mind games that you get so tired of it that you literally have to sell your stuff just to get food. We only want to buy something for maybe ten dollars the most for the both of us and yet he says oh i dont have money.
Yet he has money to buy hundred dollars worth of fish and eat six big big meals a day and have money left over to get whatever else he wants. So why cant he get us something because we depend on him right now. Its mind games i tell you. Its just making me go farther and farther down that mind path of mine to cutting and worse kill myself. I try to be positive and that God will help us which he has done so many of times. But he wants us to go through this for im not sure. Maybe its to see if we can lean on him and have more faith.
Its also sad that we have to pawn our stuff just to get food for a few days if thats even lucky for us. Im not sure what i can do. Ive applied everywhere in montana and its the suckest place to work at. Ive applied everywhere but i cant get a job for the life of me. Im not sure what i can do. Im praying all the time that God will give us a good life and this comes in the fork of things.
Me and my fiance been through worse things but this is the latest thing we have to overcome. I know we will get through this just need to have faith and learn and grow as a person. :) well i guess thats all im thinking at the moment while my master/fiance is standing here waiting to get food because he pawned somethings sigh.

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