About Me

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I'm 23 now; In the BDSM lifestyle for four- almost five years now. I am a 24/7 slave with a wonderful Daddy/fiancee: who is artcomet.blogspot.com. But as you will see in this blog are the emotions that I go through each and every day- in and out of the lifestyle. This is to show how much I've grown and bonded with my Daddy, how I've dealt with 'the world", and how I dealt with people in the BDSM lifestyle; Enjoy.

March 28, 2011

Am I true to My Reflection?

"Why is my reflection someone I don't know? Somehow I cannot hide who I am, though I've tried. When will my reflection show who I am inside?" Quote from Mulan

Why does my reflection show someone i don't know?

when i stare straight into the mirror of the unknown
Do i see myself
the true me?
Or do i see this ugly image
that passes for a human instead?

Is this truly who i am?
Or is something lurking
deeper than this shallow shell?
Who knows the true image
that reflects this person in the mirror?

Who knows who this girl is suppose to be?
Hiding feelings,actions
within a wall of wild blossom flowers

Refining, retuning the deception
she pores out onto this world

Can she endure another day
another night
of holding the porcelain mask to the world?

Somehow I cannot hide who I am, though I've tried.

So hard to be the puppet
everyone perceives me to be

yet here i am
only fooling myself

deluding myself
to be this person
everyone wants me to be

but my heart
my body
screams/aches for me to be real
to think
to act
what is truly deep inside this heart

can i bare the burdens?
the heartaches
the guilt
the lies
that will come
when i truly be who i want to be?

can i leave the old world
that i have lived
with an unbroken heart?

or will it tug
for me to come back to that side of life?
this heart
this mind
this soul
to bend to it's rules

Can i face it on my own?
can i fight another night?
to quiet that voice
that dwells deep down inside?
Can i face what will happen?
when i show my true feelings
my true life
in which i want to live instead

Can i grant that wish
that burns
that aches deep inside this chest?

Or will i smother it
smolder it
till it turns to ash

Just to shut out
the other half of me?
that lurks every moment of my life

When will my reflection show who I am inside?"

showing my true feelings
my true actions
that live inside of me?

Will my reflection ever show who i am?
Or is it just a hope
that fades every minute that passes me by?

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