About Me

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I'm 23 now; In the BDSM lifestyle for four- almost five years now. I am a 24/7 slave with a wonderful Daddy/fiancee: who is artcomet.blogspot.com. But as you will see in this blog are the emotions that I go through each and every day- in and out of the lifestyle. This is to show how much I've grown and bonded with my Daddy, how I've dealt with 'the world", and how I dealt with people in the BDSM lifestyle; Enjoy.

November 21, 2011

not sure what to do, rant

I really dont know what to do anymore. I feel like my only options are these: God gives us a good job.. or go homeless.

 This house, i live in, isnt a home at all. Im getting sick, because a person has to be evil, and cant help from the goodness of his heart. Im getting sick because the uncle wants to be evil and probably want us out or something.

 Seems, like ever since he came home from his vacation, he has been like this. Always smelling of cologne. And im not talking about a light one, oh no. I am talking you can smell it all through out the house, and that it lingers, and gets stuck on your own clothes.

 All of this could be resolved if he took a damn bath every day and put on deodrant.. but no, he doesnt want to take a bath and such. So he smells way too much, and the only thing he thinks he can do is, bathe in cologne.

 All this does is kill me. I am getting my bronchitis again. I thought it was from the weather and i think a little bit of it, is coming from that, but it is mostly coming from colognes. I am getting nothing but migraines and coughing my head off and weasing.

i may have to go into the doctors, to get an inhaler and such, and not sure what money to use on that. I just want out of this house. Since the uncle, doesnt give a rat ass, that he hurts us.
 This is becoming like my old home. Before i left, it got really bad, and it is getting like that again. Only this time it is biologoical warfare. And it is hurting us.

I get so mad because he knows what he is doing and doesnt care at all. And i also get mad at God, because He knows how bad we hurt here, and yet we are stuck here. I cant live another year like this. Need to do something.. not sure what though.

 But to show you how evil the uncle is.. not even that long ago, about two days ago.. he uses up all my laundry soap.. and i can only have two laundry soaps, that wont break me out, and yet he uses it all up. So he gets some, guess what, not the one i can have.. So, i told him out right to his face, about three times, so it would stay in his head, i can only have sun.. nothing else..
 So he goes to safeway, guess what, he gets armor hammer, cant even have that, and i told him that. I said i can only have sun, and he gets mad at me, like i am the one at fault, because i cant use it.

I get so mad at this. Because its like im playing these games, when im not. Its like why would i fucking tell you to your face, that i can only have certain things. I dont say this for nothing.
 there is a reason why i can only have certian amount of things, its because im allergic.. hello. Does anyone fucking listen to a damn word i say? And act like im the fucking stupid one..

This is just getting as bad as my family. If i get any sicker than what i am, i swear, the bitch in me, will come out, and will not go away, til something happens. I really hate that someone will hurt me biogolically because they dont want me in the home. dont want me here, just fucking say it to my face, instead of hurting me.

Ive dealt with this for the longest, and i cant keep going on like this. If it doesnt stop, just will have to go homeless, nothing else we can do. I know God will provide.. but seriously He needs to hurry up on this.

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