About Me

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I'm 23 now; In the BDSM lifestyle for four- almost five years now. I am a 24/7 slave with a wonderful Daddy/fiancee: who is artcomet.blogspot.com. But as you will see in this blog are the emotions that I go through each and every day- in and out of the lifestyle. This is to show how much I've grown and bonded with my Daddy, how I've dealt with 'the world", and how I dealt with people in the BDSM lifestyle; Enjoy.

November 17, 2011

What fakes do in this lifestyle.... rules i found...

Red Flags:
1) Tries to separate you from your friends, family or B.D.S.M community.

2) Avoids talking about personal details. Gets mad when you ask or quickly ends the conversation or answers questions with questions.

3) Has no B.D.S.M references or friends you can talk to.
I don't agree with this one. You do not have to talk to their friends to figure out who they are. You need to talk directly to them, and if they cant be honest, then you need to go somewhere else. Also, they do not need references in this lifestyle, to be a good Dom.

4) Gets angry when you ask for references or ask around about them.
Well of course, i would get pissed off to, if you went around trying to snoop on them, instead of talking to them directly.Common sense

5) Is inconsistent with details about themselves.

6) Does not give you their home and work phone number at the appropriate time.
Well, if you just met off the Internet, it would be unwise to give a work and phone number right away. Again, common sense.

7) Only communicates with you at strange hours and gets mad if you try to contact them at other times.
Well lets think on this one, what if they have to work a lot, and you call them while they are working.That will get them into trouble. Not all of these are going to make a Dom bad, because they have to work in life and etc. Again, common sense that this is alright.

8) Criticizes the B.D.S.M community and refuses to participate,especially if they never were part of it.
You do not have to be a bad Dom, to not participate in the community. Hell neither me nor my Master does this, and He is an excellent Master.And we get on to almost all of the people in the lifestyle, because you know why? They are fakes and such, as most of these rules or so, show.

9) Consistently breaks promises.
Cant keep all promises, and a Dom doesn't have to do this...

10) Always finds excuses for not meeting.

11) Always puts blame on others for things going wrong.

12) Does not take personal responsibility.

13) Has bad relationships with most or all of their family members.
Now, since i am a slave, this goes for me. It does not show that i am a bad slave or my Master as well. All people can not be happy with their families and have good ones. But this does not mean, that all slaves are going to bad and not trustworthy because they come from a broken home, and as well as a Dom.

14) Pressures you into doing things you do not want to do.
Well this one is pretty vague. As a slave, you are suppose to be pushed into doing things that we wouldn't necessarily do unless pushed, that is a soft limit... but if they are talking about a hard limit, then i agree, to a point. You can always get through your hard limits, just with time though.

15) Does not respect your limits, negotiations or contracts.

16) Pushes you into a D/s relationship too fast.
This one i kinda agree but then again not. You should never be pushed into a D/s relationship. This is consent, and always will be. If is your decision to be in it, and not the other way around.

17) Falls in love with you way too fast and swears undying love before even meeting you.
I disagree in some ways with this. It could happen, like it did with me and my Master fell in love without ever meeting and such, but also it took time, about two months into chatting and such. So, it can happen, and it could be true, don't always keep to this. Keep to your head, heart and of course common sense.

18) Hides behind their D/s authority and says that their authority should not be questioned.
Again, this is vague. The questions that needs to be asked and answered in this, is did you do something to make them say this? Or what, because if so, they have the right.. they are the Dom of course... but if they just come out of nowhere with it, then i agree, you can go somewhere else.

19) Tries to make you feel guilty for not being good enough. Says that you are not a "True" sub.
Again, this is false, and very vague...If you are into humiliation, like i am, it happens all the time. Also it could be a reverse psychology... to make you work harder or to do something, then its fine.i find no fault in this, and makes a Dom bad, and such.

20) Loses control of their emotions in arguments and regresses to yelling, name-calling and blame.

21) Puts you down in front of other people.
Again, if you are into humiliation, then this is fine... and they do it in public with others...

22) Turns instantly on their friends, going from best friend to an arch enemy at the drop of a hat.

23) Treats you lovingly and respectfully one day and then harshly and accusingly the next.
Well again, vague... what if you did something wrong? They have the right to be harsh on you and punish you... need to specify what is going on with these rules..

24) Goes to great lengths to get revenge on people.

25) Lies or withholds information. Cheats on you or is overly jealous.

26) Will not discuss what your possible future relationship could be like.
How would they know this? If it is their first time, having a slave, then how will they know, what will happen in the future? No one knows... even an experienced Dom, who has many slaves, still do not know that as well...

27) Tries to keep you in the dark about what might happen next in the relationship.
Again, vague as hell. If you are having a session, or something like that, then He has the right to keep you in the dark with that. But if they are talking about, not telling you, He has other subs and such, then i agree... other than that no.

28) Does not respect your feelings, rights, or opinions.

29) Belittles your ideas.

30) Blames you for your hurt feelings.

31) Abuses alcohol or other drugs.

32) Is constantly asking for large amounts of money from you or others.

33) Threatens suicide or other forms of self-harm.

34) Deliberately saying or doing things that result in getting themselves seriously hurt.

35) Monitors your communications (emails, phone calls, chats) with others.
As i think the same way. If you consent to this, then it is fine, other than that, then this isn't good.

36) Only interacts with you in a kinky or sexual manner as if role-playing.
Which most do anyways... and why they are fake as hell.. and plus some cant be in it 24/7, so its hard to say on this as well.

37) Will not have normal everyday vanilla conversations.

38 Never shows you their human side. Is emotionless. Hides their vulnerability behind their D/s role.

39) Has multiple online identities for interacting with the same communities.
Hm, this one i don't agree on. My Master has to have different id names and such, because He does not want to be known who He is, and same with me. This is vague.. if that is no the reason behind it, then i would agree that this means its a bad sign of a bad Dom.. other than that, no.

40) Disappears from communication for days or weeks at a time without explanation.

41) Is rude to public servants such as waitresses, cashiers and janitors.

42) Never says thank you, excuse me or I am sorry to anyone.

*As I have seen in these rules to find out of the Dom is good or bad, for the most part, wrong on so many levels. I guess you can say, the reason being, is well, most of them are vague on what the person is saying. Does go fully into it, so you are left with all this questions. When there shouldn't be none, to see the "red flags" in a B.D.S.M lifestyle.
As my Master has said, and I think He is right on this, is a slave, doesn't want to be a slave,and trying to make excuses on this. Why else would you post these vague things up in the first place? I had to remark on these, because well they didn't sit right on me, at all. And as i have been in the lifestyle for a long time, i know when things are right or not... as in this...(not saying im always correct, just when it comes to seeing "red flags" is all.)

So i advise you, if you are looking this blog up, and seeing it, i highly think you should re-evaluate what is going on. Because most will act like a slave and do not want to be one, so they make up excuses, I.E. the rules above... Until next time.....

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