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I'm 23 now; In the BDSM lifestyle for four- almost five years now. I am a 24/7 slave with a wonderful Daddy/fiancee: who is artcomet.blogspot.com. But as you will see in this blog are the emotions that I go through each and every day- in and out of the lifestyle. This is to show how much I've grown and bonded with my Daddy, how I've dealt with 'the world", and how I dealt with people in the BDSM lifestyle; Enjoy.

December 26, 2011

Family, oh family

It's kinda sad to know ill never have the whole family get together for Christmas eve and Christmas. But, being with my mom and dad only, always makes up for it. At least I know that part of the family loves me. The rest can get over themselves. Except for one of our cousins.

sister: I'm not being hateful. I'm just tired of seeing it... No family to spend it with, so why be all cheerful? Just another bullshit day, nothing special about it. Only thing, happy birthday Jesus. That's about it though. You wouldn't blow my wall up with that, would you?

Okay, i saw this a few days ago on my sis's facebook wall. Yes, i do look from time to time to see how the family is acting to see if i can be able be family again. But i saw this, and i have to shake my head at this.

I see on Christmas day that she is all moody and what not. And it is reference to me, in a subtle way. Saying that it is my fault that im not with the family. That it is my fault that she cant have a good Christmas and what not. I hate when family whine about this.
 Because it makes me think, well why do they only love or miss me on one holiday of the year but for the rest of the time, they can hit me and call me everything in the book. So, how does that make sense that it is my fault that im not with the family. Just doesnt make sense at all.

She tells this to a friend of hers, that she cant spend it with family so why be cheerful. Hm well that makes me think, all the times we were nice and what not to each other it was a fake happiness. So, it just shows how evil my family is, and that it is sad, that the only time they want to think of me is on this holiday.

I guess my hopes of becoming a family is a fail, but that is okay. I have wiped my feet from this family and will make a new family soon. Until next time....

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