About Me

My photo
I'm 23 now; In the BDSM lifestyle for four- almost five years now. I am a 24/7 slave with a wonderful Daddy/fiancee: who is artcomet.blogspot.com. But as you will see in this blog are the emotions that I go through each and every day- in and out of the lifestyle. This is to show how much I've grown and bonded with my Daddy, how I've dealt with 'the world", and how I dealt with people in the BDSM lifestyle; Enjoy.

October 30, 2011

And you wonder why i dont add pics nor really chat with people in the lifestyle....

Mishto

Him:
you.

Me:
what?

him:
your a slave?

me:
Yes i am, in the BDSM lifestyle
why?

him:
i happen to be looking for 1

me:
okay, well im owned
good luck though

him:
how much can i get you for?

me:
im not for sale

him:
y not?!

me:
i already told you, im owned
shessh, start reading

him:
damn
your busy?

me:
no
why?

him:
be with me here for a while.

me:
well if that isnt a command and such, fine

him:
it isnt. i cant command at all?

me:
what? i dont and cant take commands from anyone else

him:
ok. can u give commands?

me:
no

him:
so what can we do?

me:
Chit chat, like human beings

him:
im a horny being baby

me:
and goodbye

him:
y?

me:
because i dont deal with people who are horny and acting like they are in the lifestyle

him:
u are a bdsm slave~

me:
yea, doesnt mean i have to deal with dumbass people who are in the lifestyle, that are horny fake ass people
i dont "play", nor actually have the sex in the lifestyle, like most fake people do

him:
you are so so nice. im so happy to meet u. now fuck off.

me:
lol oh how pathetic you sound. Like that makes you a Dom
please

him:
i dont feel like wasting my time any more. look inside yourself, dont judge others. have a great time. bye.

me:
lol, you are the one who is wasting time here. Im not judging i see it as the truth. You were here looking for another slave. I said no, and then want me to chat, but you want it as a horny chat, but dont know how to respect someone who is owned. Yea, that is real nice to say, look inside myself. I know im true to myself, i think you need to look inside yourself. like the bible says, pluck our your own spinter before you do it to someone else
anyways, done with your dumbass, fake wanna be Dom.

and you wonder why i dont talk to people in the lifestyle... People who think they are Dom's always do this to me. They see im a slave and just have to Dom me. That isnt what a Master is about. shessh people. Also, the reason im posting this, is to show you, what i go through, almost on a daily basis, with fake people in the lifestyle. You kinda see how it goes, when people see that im a slave. They automatically think, im not owned and want to do this. Sometimes it does get tiresome, but you have to keep protecting your Master and yours bond.

October 26, 2011

I've made my mind up.....

Well, I've been talking to Daddy, and watching a movie, called, Midnight in Paris, And, it has got me thinking, that i should write a story. Maybe collaborate with Daddy on one of my many story ideas i have always had. And also, i have made up my mind, and will be writing my memoir as well.

I really have decided to write down all my memories, all my thoughts, and what ever goes on in my life. It has taken me this long to realize that i have always wanted to do this. I have always wanted to write about what i have gone through, and maybe other stories, that go through my head.

I have always loved writing, even as a child, and hopefully i can make this happen. I have been told countless times, to get my work published and to write novels. But, i just need a push, in the right direction, and that is why i say i will collaborate with Daddy, since He is better at building characters than i am.

All i wanted to say for now. Ashpea

October 22, 2011

Survey.... you get to see a little bit more of me...

1. Do you believe in "till death do us part"?
hm, if you are really for real, then yes. I take it very serious in a marriage.
2. Do you believe in love at first sight?
No, i do not believe in it. It takes a long time to get to know a person and to love them for who they are. If you just fall in love at first sight, i hate to say it, its just lust or infatuation going on there. Nothing else to it.
3. Would you date anyone you met online?
yes, i have... and i am loving Him every minute of my life... He is the best thing that has happened in my life.
4. Would you date the person who posted this?
no
5. Do you believe in God?
Yes, i do. I love Him with all my heart and soul...
6. Do you believe in the afterlife?
yup, i sure do.
7. Are you emotional?
Not really emotional. I have my moments, but hell we are humans, we are going to be emotional creatures... I do get depressed easily or angry.. but that is a part of me, i need to change :P
8. Get along with your parents?
I really never have. Sure, they would have their good moments, for maybe a day, and then go back to their patterns. And you wonder why we don't talk anymore...
9. Get along with your siblings?
And again, no and i don't want too. Tried long enough, don't appreciate me, for who i am, then they arnt my family.
10. How are you feeling right now?
I'm hurting a lot right now, as a matter of fact. Also, a bit sleepy and hungry.... Been up wayy to long. Sigh
11. Are you too forgiving?
For the most part, yes, but that is what we are suppose to be. God, wants us to have love and to forgive our enemies.. and if you have grudges then you become a bitter person. But i am human, and at times it takes me a while to forgive someone, depending on what they did to me.
12. Last time you cried?
About two days ago. Ugh, don't bring that up, please.
13. Whats your favorite season?
Fall. I always feel good in my skin, this time of the season. I always feel hm refreshed, and good memories that i always keep with me. I love the smell of the crisp cool air, the leaves turning color, the sunsets and etc.
14. What is your favorite animal?
Well i have a few now lol. I love tigers, turtles(any kind, but mostly sea turtles), lambs, kangaroos and etc..
15. Have you ever crawled through a window?
once.. when i was pretty young.
16. Have you ever been arrested?
no, I've been good lol
17. Do you talk in your sleep?
no, but i do move a lot, which i hate. And mumble at times.
18. Do you like thunderstorms?
yes, i love them. I love the sound,the smell and everything about them. Just calms me down.
19. Ever caught a fish?
Never been fishing.
20. Do you have any pets?
Use to have pets. Had a lot of dogs, growing up. Then before moving, had a terrier... then moved and had a cat and a bunny. Which both have died. Sigh
21. Do you take walks often?
yes, i love to walk.
22. Do you know a 2nd language?
I know only a few words in a lot of languages.
23. Do you like to read?
Hell yes i do.. cough, book worm here.
24. How often do you read books?
Constantly. I read every day. I take a few hours out of my day to read.
25. Do you like walking in the rain?
It's okay. But what i don't like is that i get sick, which sucks.
26. Are you more outgoing or shy?
Well now, i guess I'm in between. I am outgoing at points and also shy at points.
27. How is the weather right now?
i don't know, let me check....(goes to google)...Says its 54 mostly cloudy.
28. Chocolate or Vanilla?
hm, chocolate more so.. but dark.
29. Who would you like to see right now?
No one really.
30. How many pillows do you sleep with?
Two.
31. Are you missing someone?
Right now, not really. But i do miss someone at random points in my life.
32. Favorite drink?
Nonalcoholic? juices,water or some pop(Dr. pepper mixed with cherry Pepsi)
Alcoholic? straight vodka with cranberry apple juice
33. Have you been in a car accident?
Yes,and its really scary. And whiplash is not fun either.
34. Do you exercise?
Yup, i walk a lot.
35. Have you ever been swimming in a lake or river?
Yea, and i didn't like it really. Will never do that again.
36. Have you ever camped under the stars?
Does camping in your backyard work? Because its what i have done, and its okay...
37. Have you ever milked a cow?
Yes, i actually have. It feels weird and its very hard to do it.
38. Do you have or want any Piercings?
I use to have my ears pierced.. but I'm allergic to almost all the metals.. and got infected.. now i don't want any piercings, unless Daddy wants me to get my cartilage pierced or my ears pierced again, with the right metals i can have.
39. Are you in love?
yes i am
40. Have you ever set foot in a tanning salon?
Oh gosh no, and never will
41. Have you ever played strip poker?
I sure did. Cheated, had oh seven or eight pairs of everything. :D
42. What's your mother's favorite color?
Purple or green. Not really sure anymore.
43. What's your dad's favorite color?
Blue.
44. What is your favorite musical?
Rogers and Hammerstein's Cinderella
45. Have you ever lied about your age?
No, why would i lie about my age. Some people don't think I'm 23, because of the way, i hold a conversation..
46. Have you ever faked being drunk?
no, Ive been drunk a couple of times, but i don't really change who i am.. just a bit more carefree and don't think a lot.
47. When is the last time you were on a bicycle/bike?
oh gosh, since middle school maybe... so um 12 years or so lol
48. Have you ever fallen out of love?
No, because i was never really in love with anyone.
49. Ever used a fake id or an id that wasn't you?
Why would i use a fake id? and for what purpose?
50. Are you donating your organs?
I would like to, but i don't know if i can, since my genes suck like hell.
51. What is the last thing you ate?
Doritos..
52. What's the last thing you drank?
Water
53. Who called you last?
Daddy's mom.
54. Are you truly happy right now or putting on a show?
Inside, hm I'm truly happy, but sometimes i can get upset and such. Outside, i am more upset, or tired looking than anything.
55. Has a lover ever cheated on you?
Yes, and it fucking sucks.
56. Would you ever take that person back?
As a stupid little girl, i did, and guess what they still cheated on me. how stupid was i.
57. Have you ever cheated on a lover?
No, I'm loyal to the people i give my love out too.
58. Do you have a best friend?
I have two.
59. Honestly and don't lie, hows your heart these days?
It's okay ish. It could be a lot better though.
60. Have you ever had a one night stand?
nope, that is being a damn slut.
61. Have you ever visited a 3rd world country?
No, I'm not sure if i would like too.
62. Is there anyone that knows everything about you?
Yup, two people. God and Daddy/fiancee.
63. If you were in a crisis would you tell anyone?
Yea, but I would be cautious of who i talk too.
64. Can you keep a secret?
yes, i can.
65. What are your views on drug abuse?
I know that some people cant handle the real world, so they have to use substances in order to stay in this world. But, it is really hard to quit. It is hard to see people go through it... so people who do it, know that it will screw with you for the rest of your life.
66. Would you cheat on your taxes if you knew you could get away with it?
I still don't know if i would do that.
67. If an elderly person was overly rude to you, would you tell them off?
Yup, I've done it a lot of times, and i will do it again, if they become rude to me.
68. Have you ever been married?
I am engaged and owned.
69. Have you ever been divorced?
No.
70. Do you live in a house or an apartment?
I guess a house, you can call it that. ugh.
71. Would you say your house/apartment is big or small?
It's pretty big.
72. Do you have a welcome mat?
Not really. I need to get one though lol
Spoiler:
What does this mean????
73. Does it say something?
Say what???
74. Do you have a special place where you put your keys?
I guess. Just in my purse lol
75. Do you know your neighbors?
Don't have neighbors.
76. If so do you get along with them?
Oh yes, i get along just fine with them. Rolls eyes.
77. Which room would you say you spend the most time in?
Um, my bedroom... and the living room.
78. What kind of stuff do you have on your walls?
I have an old calendar(That has seen better days), Stickers that spell out, "I love you" in Halloween stickers.(Been up for about two/three years), and a small paper that says"I love you with all my heart and soul"(By Daddy)
79. What's under your bed?
Probably my stuff animals, and maybe monsters... who knows..
80. How long is your hair?
A little past my shoulders.(Growing my hair out now, and finally gotten that long, in six months or so)
81. Do you drink beer?
Oh gosh, that stuff is really nasty. The only one that tastes okay is Sparks... but I'm most a hard liquor person.
82. What are you listening to right now?
Daddy talking to His sister.
83. What have you had to drink so far today?
i had a little bit of water, and Dr. pepper..
84. Has anyone ever given you roses?
no, I actually bought myself some. How pathetic is that. Sigh
85. How tall are you?
Found out for sure about a month ago, I'm 5'6. I've shrunk a bit. Ugh.
86. Why did your last relationship end?
Hm, well the dude was a stalker, and also, cheated on me, and plus he really didn't care for me. So, i ended it. Why keep two girls going, if you don't care about one, but once you get dumped, become obsessed about it.
87. Do you look more like your mom or your dad?
I'm a spittin image of my aunt on my dad's side of the family.
88. Are you scared of flying?
No, which is pretty weird. I am deathly afraid of heights, but flying, i love. What i don't like about flying is i get very sick. Didn't know how much, air sickness i have. When i get on a plane, i can not eat anything while on. So, i normally just drink a lot of orange juice to get me through it.
89. Are you easy to get along with?
Yes, i am easy to get along with, until you have crossed a line with me. Either talking bad about my Daddy or just being a bitch... we will have conflict and will not like you at all. (Sorry, just how i am)
90. What is your favorite TV channel?
MXC, TV land, Sci-fi,AMC,Hallmark,Lifetime,Disney, Cartoon network, and maybe more,that i cant think of.
91. Do you have a favorite TV show?
Um,i guess, Bones, Carnival, Fringe, and maybe others. I watch a lot of anime and other things as well.
92. Do you believe people can fall in love at any age?
No, from six to fourteen or so, no... Because it is just infatuation, and it takes a long long time, to know what love is and to be in love.
93. Have you talked to a jerk today?
Um no, but i have talked to a bitch... does that count?
94. How many windows are open on your computer?
six windows, and then I'm not sure how many tabs are open though, but I'm guessing about four to five in each one. :P Lucky I'm not freezing right now :D
95. Have you ever had the chicken pox?
Yes, i had them when i was five/six... and i have scars mostly on my arms and back... i had them pretty bad.
96. Have you been outside today?
yes, i have. It was very very eerie.
97. How many pics do you have in your bedroom?
No...
98. Have you ever thought of having plastic surgery?
When i was younger, i sorta contemplated it. But then i watched a show on it, and how they put in fake boobs, and they just threw the nipple to the side... that is when i decided, Hell no. I will be comfortable with my body, even if i fucking hate it, i am not going to do that shit to my body.
99. If you have Myspace, how long have you had it?
Yea, its still up, but I'm not on it anymore. Should probably close it lol. And Ive had it, hell nine or so years.
100. Have you ever slapped a boy/girl in the face?
Not really. I punch. Not a fucking sissy when it comes to fighting.
101. Why/how did you chose your username?
well for what, allpoetry-SlaveWaterNymph... well lets see, I am a slave in the BDSM lifestyle and I'm owned, and also Daddy gave me the nickname water nymph... so tad da..
Wireclub-Slave_Ashpea_Nymph... Same reason, but Ashpea is my name...
102. If someone were to tell you how they felt, would you listen?
Yes, i would.
103. Have you ever been to Starbucks?
Yes, It wasn't the greatest for so much money, and also, i cant have coffee.
104. Are you too shy to ask someone out?
No, Ive done it a dozen times... it doesn't scare me. I know what i want, and if i like someone, i will ask.. how do you think i got engaged to Daddy.. :P
105. Hugs or Kisses?
Hm, if i had to pick, kisses more so. More intimate and means a great more deal than hugs.
106. If you found out you were dying, who would you tell first?
Daddy/fiancee.. but He would already know that... so um, God.. after that I'm not sure, who..
107. Do you take compliments well?
Not really. I think most of them are just to get into my pants, and they are lies. But if it is coming from Daddy, then i take them very well.
108. Do you use cuss words in other languages?
Yes lol
109. What do you like most about yourself?
hmmm, Well i guess i will go with my physical features...I love my eyes,because they look like the ocean, my hands, because they look feminine, more so than the rest of my body, i also love my hips, not sure why i like those, maybe how they are coming out now, can feel the bones and the curves to it. And also, my feet,which is another feature that is feminine.
Now, personality/who i am... i love how strong i have become from all the abuse i have gone through. How much i have grown and learned in the lifestyle as a slave. Also, exploring my Domme side, and i love being who i am. I love being loving, caring, and Dominating(when i can actually be a Domme at times). It is just who i am. I know i can be stubborn, and sometimes people say they are annoyed to be around me, but that is how it goes. So there is a lot of things i love about myself. I also love writing and reading, those are my passions, and wish i can get a career in that area.
110. Do you read, watch or listen to the news?
Well, when i had a t.v. i did, all the time, and i would watch it. But now, that i don't have a t.v. i only watch it on youtube, here and there.


What's been going on....

Okay, as well, I'm updating of what has been going on in the last week or so. Sorry, i haven't been posting a lot. I've been on a somewhat of a vacation with Daddy. So, there is only one, computer and i have to share it with Daddy. And of course, me being the slave, gets it last or when He gives it to me.

So, what has been going on, is quite a bit. This week or so, have been a lot of ups and downs for me and Daddy. W/we have gotten in a lot of fights. And one major one. Which wasn't good at all.

I really hate when small stupid things grow into a huge snowball, that it takes a while to mend things with your partner. Well, like i said, W/we had a fight. And it took two days to actually get back on track with E/each other.

This one, was really bad. Usually it takes U/us the next day to forgive one another and have a stronger bond with it, and learn from the fights as W/we go. But, this one, it took a little more. Which kinda shooked me up. Because as one of the arguments go, is that I came close to being,hmm what would the word be.... i guess fired or let go of being a slave.

This usually happens,"being let go as a slave" or thinking about it, is when i have really crossed the line. But this time, Ashpea hasn't done anything that went over that line. So, it really did shake me up, and i was out of it for a while. And i saw a side of Daddy, that kinda disturbed me, but i also knew that this really wasn't Him. He has been having a really hard time with some things. And i don't hold it against Him.

I know that a part of that stupid argument it was my fault. That i was selfish for wanting some time to myself and etc. So, i do deserve some things to what had happened,those nights.
And most of you think, why are you taking the blame. Well, because it was partically my fault. And i will admit to it, when i know i have been in the wrong. And it takes a good slave to understand that and to accept her punishment for it.

But, mostly that has happened through the week, but also some really good times as well. And i like to hold the good memories more so than the horrible ones. But, in the back on my mind, and inside my heart, i grow from the fights, grow to understand and have a bigger bond with Daddy.

Anyways, after that, I'm pretty much mad at Daddy's family. Been getting on my fucking nerves, and they are just as bad as my family, if not worse, just without the abuse to it.
What's been going on with them, is grr... They say one thing, just before going to Cali, that sure, we can help you with food. And they are there and say,"well, we'll see what we can do" and only gives us a little bit after a freaking bitter conversation and someone being an ass on the phone.

Also, what i don't like about His family, is that, they are only buddy buddy with you, if you have money. Then they think the world of you. But, if you don't have work, and needing help, then you are a fucking bum. Now, this is where i get really mad.
They think, Daddy's uncle, Jim is very very nice... okay, but they think His daddy was a very bad man. Talk bad about him even after he is dead. It makes me mad, that they think this, when His father tried his hardest to help the family out.

It's like, the family only cares, if you sit on your fucking lazy ass and get money from the government... disability and don't have to do a damn thing. But, if you are looking for work, and still with family or such, then you are worthless and a bum.
But, i guess this is how the world works now. That most people, sit on their lazy asses and get all the approvals they need, but don't have to do a damn thing.
While, people who work very hard, get called a bum and etc.

This world is crumbling slowly as the years go by. And in a few more years, i think it will be completely crushed, the way things are going. People just made this world bad, and not trying to produce any good in it. What a shame...
Well, i think i will end this rant... Until next time......

A lesson in the lifestyle....

Well, as i said in my last rant or such, that i was going to post up, what has been going on. Well lets see, here. Oh, a couple of days ago, i fell on a plastic container and now, i am still hurting, with also some lovely bruises and cuts.

Now, let me back up, because this is one thing, i want to show, what can go wrong in one single "session",as some say, or a little bit of what goes on in my life. The D/s part.

Well the few days ago, i was talking to Daddy in the living room, and Daddy comes up behind me, and tries to bite my neck. For some odd reason, i got spooked. Which leads to me moving in an awkward motion, that made me and Daddy fall on a fish tank, and the plastic container with also a vacuum.

That led to serious freaking pain, only i was worried about Daddy. Since He is disabled, i didn't want Him to get hurt anymore than what He is. But, the pain was unbearable. Almost felt as bad, as when i broke my ankle.

Came close to throwing up, and was trying my hardest to control my breathing. Daddy went and got some tissues and alcohol to stop the bleeding. He said that the container left an imprint on my back, and kept asking if my back was okay. He was more worried about me, than Him.

Now, this leads me to this. This is what you really get when you don't have trust in the lifestyle or for your Master/partner. This is why, i am writing this. Because if you do not have trust, if you do not have communication, this could happen. If not worse.

This is why, i speak so passionately on this. This is why i try to warn people in the lifestyle, who don't know what they are doing, or just in it for kink. This is merely a few things that happen, when my trust is let down, and when there isn't really any communication going on.(This only happens with U/us when Daddy wants to just sneak up behind me.)

Most people don't take me serious, but this is why i say, you need to know what you are getting into. Need to know how to react when things go awry and also, the most important thing for a slave is that. You TRUST your Master.
Because if you get, lets say, tied up so secured that you cant get out on your own. And you don't have that trust, and you cant handle the pain, and they don't let up. You are going to be in serious trouble.

Maybe, this will shed some light on how serious this lifestyle is. And that this will be a lesson some people can learn from these mistakes. Which W/we do as well. Why this lifestyle is a learning and growing process all the time.

Anyways, this is all i have to say for now, on the lifestyle... Until next time.....

October 21, 2011

What's been going on....

*Head's up for family..... I was not raped, or did not consent to what happened today. So i would like it, if you did visit my blog today or so, that you can keep your noses out of it. Thanks...*

Well today was pretty exciting. At first, it was pretty bad, because of the damn uncle. Thought W/we wouldn't get any food money and was kinda stressing over it a bit.
Then, I'm glad that God came through for U/us. Got a bit of food money. Glad to get some kind of food money. So, W/we had to go to the bank, and then went to a thrift shop.

Boy, did i get more books.:D. Got twenty books again, which are very interesting. Most of them are Historical romance. But i did get a few, that i was pretty happy to get, were Louis Lowry(a book, i haven't read yet, i guess it goes on with "The Giver".) Also got the first book of the Unfortunate events. I have always wanted to read those books, but just didn't have the money, because they were brand new, when i first saw them.

Also, on the book rant, i have or need to catalog, "The Frenchwoman" and post it up. Also, reading now, "Vanity Fair" which is very very good. It goes almost alike with the book, just a tad different. I will blog on that a little later.

Moving on.... okay, well later on tonight, i am pretty much giddy. Daddy went next door and said He was going to get some snacks. He comes back, without anything, and i didn't think any thing of it. And well not really getting into details, was surprised to have sex.

It was sorta like rape play, but really it wasn't. It was just forced. It really shocked the hell out of me. I wasn't expecting it at all. When He first did it, i was really shocked, and the pain, but about two seconds or so, it went over to pleasure.

I tried getting away, because i wasn't sure about a few things, and He just did what He want. I really liked it, but the reason i am writing on this, is because, well this is for me, and to show how i am progressing in the lifestyle and with myself as well.

I would like to say, is that i am very very proud and shocked at how much i have grown in these past four/five years with my Daddy. I know for the past year or so, i have been pondering, if i would cope with forced sex, or "rape play". And i have always said, i would not do well. But tonight, that perspective has changed a lot.

I really really thought, i would not cope well, and that i would hit and scream and such. But tonight i didn't do that. I was shocked, and i did have my memories, try coming up, but i think my defensive's kicked in, and then from there my trust kicked in. I had a few thoughts come in, like how helpless i am, and etc.

I just cant get over, how much i have changed. I thought i would be a certain way, and then, when W/we do things, i am a totally different person. I don't know if i had said anything about this, but who i was four/five years ago, was this negative person. Who was always negative in some way, who always cut and didn't trust anyone. I was by myself almost all the time, and was very sad and didn't have a friend at all.

But, now, i am always putting positive feedback into me, i do not cut anymore. And when those urges come back, i talk and do things to not do it. I am not really sad anymore, i have trust, i have someone who loves me for me, and that i can grow with, and trust with my whole soul. I have that amazing person, who has made me, me in those years.

I really didn't see how much i have changed and grown since then. Because you know, you really don't know until something happens. Something major or bad that happens and it shows you how much stronger you have become and etc.

I know that i need to work on more things, and to grow more so as the person i am. But i am very glad and thankful that God gave me, my soul mate. I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for the both of them in my life. They have changed my perspective and i am willing and slowly changing it even more so, as we speak.

I know, in the future, that i will get over the emotional damage that was caused for a long long time, and that those wounds will be healed. And i know that i will be a lot more happier, a lot more stabler(in emotions, finance, and etc). It will just have to take time and someone you really trust to be there for you.

But, i think this rant or so is done for now. I just wanted to update, and get my other rant, written down and posted. Sorry for the long wait guys. Been on vacation with Daddy and it has been a rocky road. I will tell it in the next rant. Until next time.....

October 9, 2011

Me topping a so called "Dom"....

*This happened at Four AM my time on myyearbook*

Joseph
why do you not have a real picture

You
I'm not allowed to put my picture up

Joseph
Why I have to ask

You
because my Master doesnt allow it. Why do you have to know so badly?

Joseph
because I like pushing buttons are you curious

You
What buttons and curious about what?

Joseph
nothing much are you afraid to chat

You
And why do you even say that?

Joseph
Let's chat then

You
um okay

Joseph
You really wants to chat

You
Why dont you just chat instead of trying to waste my time.

Joseph
I would love to chat I am not wasting your time

Joseph
would you call me

You
im not calling anyone. And yes you are sorta wasting my time. Three times you have asked me if i want to chat. And i have replied to each one. Now if i didnt want to fucking chat i wouldnt of responded. So, make up your damn mind, before i make it up for you. Either chat or not. Stop being a fucking sissy. Hell

Joseph
Chat now

Joseph
Now I'm not some p**** b****

You
Yes you are a fucking pussy boy. You keep fucking asking to chat. Hell that is what a fucking sissy does. cant make up their damn minds. So you either fucking start talking, or you either walk away. One or the other. The next time i see chat now or something along those lines, i will seriously cuss your ass out and then block. Im tired of people being fucking so whipped. Come on

Joseph
give me your number b**** and I'll talk to you the do not talk to me like that

Joseph
f*** you you are my b****

You
Actually i can and i have. Dont like it then fucking leave. I dont care if you call me a bitch, but if you are trying to be a Dom it isnt working at all. All you are is a fucking whiny ass kid. Go bother someone else, with your little problems in conversing with people.

Joseph
glad you don't understand me seems to me you're afraid to chat with anyone

You
lol. Oh my gosh. YOU SO FUCKING NEED TO KNOW WHAT THE FUCKING LIFESTYLE IS ABOUT. BEING A DAMN DOM AND CUSSING PEOPLE OUT AND SAYING YOUR MY BITCH. ISNT GONNA GET ANYWHERE WITH THAT. I DONT KNOW IF YOU HAVE NOTICE IM FUCKING OWNED FOR ONE. TWO I DONT GIVE A FUCK IF YOU ARE A DAMN DOM OR NOT, I WILL NOT RESPECT THAT AT ALL.

AND IF YOU THINK ACTING SOMEWHAT SWEET IN THE BEGINNING AND THEN TRYING TO "DOM" LIKE SAYING THINGS LIKE THAT, YOU NEED SOME DISCIPINE IN THIS LIFESTYLE. BECAUSE NO SLAVE WILL EVER LET THAT GO.

YOU GOT SOME NERVE TO TRY AND SAY THAT, WHILE MY MASTER IS NEXT TO ME AND ON HERE AS WELL. YOU NEED TO GET A BETTER LIFE THAN THE LIFESTYLE.

I HAVE A FEW WORDS FOR YOU, YOU ARE A DUMBASS THAT NEEDS TO GET A DAMN LIFE.

You
And there you go again, with the chat thing. And whining that i dont know you. Well wonder why. You keep repeating the same damn thing over and over. No wonder why people dont want to talk to you. Hell why dont you actually put up your real age, instead of saying 35. because you sound such like a whining teenager.

come on, i think you have something better else to say, than the same stuff over and over. Come on, dont bore me now

Joseph
save me like every text you sent me was pre recorded and if you're looking for something new then you would have found that you could of contacting me and much much better fashion you seem like a prerecorded b**** f*** you if you really thought I was gonna get into something new he just challenged me and giving me the chance did you give me a chance no because your pre can see through sessions f****** suck f you

You
lol im prerecorded lol what a hypocrite. You are the one repeating your damn ass. Can you chat, do you want to chat, chat now. How is that not repeating?

lol oh you are so fucking pathetic. I havent given you a chance. Oh boo you. I feel so sorry for your fucking life, because i didnt give you a chance. Booo fucking whoo.

You are the one who emailed me. You are the one that kept repeating over and over chatting. While i have made an actual conversation. Instead of saying oh im afraid of chatting and etc.

And you wonder why i dont live with abusive people, who loves repeating shit. And when i turn them down, or actual become a fucking bitch, they whine.

Give me something else, than that fucking lame excuse. Seriously, you have some serious issues that you need to get over. Gosh, people in this fucking lifestyle needs a fucking brain. Hell fucking creeps.

Joseph
Zb**** b**** b**** b**** b**** b**** b**** b**** b****

You
oh very mature. And with adue. So long wanna be dumbass. Who thinks he is all macho in this lifestyle and such. You are such a pathetic little whiny ass bitch, who seriously needs to learn where his place belongs. Now run along whiny sniveling little asshole. Ah, nice arguing though, you got my aggression out tonight.

Joseph
I can't help it you are staying in real

Joseph
,really you are a b****

*This is what you are going to get from me, if you are abusive, and a so called "Dom" trying to top me. It will never, ever work on me. So the reason why i posted this, is because there are a few reasons this person is a fake, and a so called "Dom" in the lifestyle.

As you have seen, he is a fake. Hence, he keeps repeating over and over, and only talks when i provoke him. This is not what a real "Dom" does. A real Dom will converse with the slave, in a polite manner, and never ever repeat things. A real Dom will know how to control His temper and etc. with the slave.

This is however, is a good example of a fake Dom. And you wonder why i dont post pics and other things up on the net. Because even on wire club, people tried "Domming" me tonight. And i didnt tolerate it at all. So, a heads up, before you talk to me or another slave, you better know that they are a human being and have feelings and such. And that they can and have the will power to cuss your ass out and etc. Gasp now, because that isnt what a so called slave is suppose to do.

Rolls eyes, people need to learn what this lifestyle is about. Instead of stupid robots in this lifestyle who just want sex only.*

October 5, 2011

Ugh, so freaking tired of things...

A lot of things have been on my mind tonight. I thought winding down and just have a light drink and just chat with people, would help. But boy was i wrong.

I'll tell you, it has been a very long day. Early today, Daddy fixed the bathroom. Thought it would never be fixed and i was being cranky on that. Finally got that done, tried to relax, but I've been so wind up, because of the blood tests and such.

So later on tonight, went and got food. Come back and i was on wire club and on myyearbook, just chatting to people. And some wanted to get into a religion debate. Saying that there is no God, and trying to keep pushing it on me, and that basically I'm diluted.

And the guy, says well mortals are better than God. They help more so than God ever has. Okay, now that is full of bologna. I have been on this Earth for 23 years. I have never met a nice person, except for Daddy.

I will give you examples in my life, like did the guy and tell you how he picked it out. Okay, well the examples are here. I was abused since the age of two till 19. I told a lot of people, to get away from it all, no one helps. I was raped twice and molested a lot of things. People saw it, never did anything. I cut and tried to get help, no one helps. I have a slight eating disorder, and no one wanted to help.

So, how is mortals better than God? That is what is on my mind right now. If mortals are so much better, then why haven't none of them helped me, when i was young and needed help? Hm, because most mortals are horrible. So here is how he picked my stuff out.

The guy on myyearbook, basically says it is my fault for having an eating disorder and that he doesn't feel bad or pity them. Well, you know what, i understand why most do it. They get degraded each day and then it gets into their head they are huge. So, i understand that point. And after that i kinda skimmed it, because i was pretty upset.

Saying, I'm just delirious and that God is a figment of my imagination. And that pisses me off. I do not push my beliefs on anyone, so why do other people try to do it to me. And you know what is sad, is that all of this started from a mere question i answered on myyearbook.

Dude, wanted to show his view points of "his religion" and that is all fine and dandy. But the reason i don't debate religion is that they get into a discussion and then they repeat over and over that God isn't there.

well, okay, you may think God isn't alive and such, but don't put me down for thinking that God is there. And that God has gotten me through a lot of things. That is what a christian is. They put God before everyone. Sure, i understand that people do things to help others out. The thing is, God works through it. So He helps no matter what.

I guess it makes me mad, that they just want to keep putting me down, for what i believe in. If it isn't my lifestyle that they put down, then they put down, that I'm a Christian. Now, this is where my blog post on wire club comes into place. If you have opinions about God, fine, keep them to yourself. And the same for my lifestyle.

I am not pushing it on anyone. I am merely showing who i am, and expressing myself as well. If you don't like it, fine, keep your mouth shut and keep going. I guess most people don't know how to do that. People just love to get into other's peoples business because they have no life.

But anyways, I'm just tired of all this. If i wanted to be degraded, i would of stayed back in TN with family and be degraded each and every day. There is a reason to moving and such. How about you keep your opinions to yourself and we will get along just fine.

Now, what i don't mind, is that if you are curious about being a Christian, or the lifestyle, you can always talk to me. Just don't place judgement on me. That is all i ask. I mean hell it isn't that hard of a request, now isn't it.

Okay, so then onto the next thing. I was talking to a guy on wire club. About how bad Montana is on jobs and such. For about two to three hours, the guy, just keeps repeating himself. That is one thing i hate. Repeating things over and over, for it to get into your head.

I think that has to do with family. I cant stand it at all. Finally had enough of it, and just made an excuse to leave. I guess what it is going on, is that I'm pretty much tired.

I'm trying to get over a sickness, trying to take care of Daddy while I'm sick, period on the way, so that is making me really grumpy and being very tired as hell.

I advise a lot of people, to keep away from me, for a while. Until next time....