About Me

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I'm 23 now; In the BDSM lifestyle for four- almost five years now. I am a 24/7 slave with a wonderful Daddy/fiancee: who is artcomet.blogspot.com. But as you will see in this blog are the emotions that I go through each and every day- in and out of the lifestyle. This is to show how much I've grown and bonded with my Daddy, how I've dealt with 'the world", and how I dealt with people in the BDSM lifestyle; Enjoy.

March 27, 2013

journal of a water nymph day four

march 27,2013

Gosh yesterday was horrible. It started out really well and that W/we finally got internet for O/our apartment. And right after that, Daddy becomes grumpy and what not, and had another fight. After this, Daddy becomes cold and harsh towards me. Then He thinks well lets put me in the closet... i wanted to try it out as a punishment and man it was harsh. I think the reason for it, is i knew what Daddy was doing. 

I started breaking and crying my eyes out. And Daddy is acting like, why am i crying like this. Finally most of the day passes, Him telling me things to do, but to get me away from the computer so He can try and meet up with a so called Domme here. Finally at the end, i tell Him what are you up to, and finally He came out and told me. 

I couldnt tell Him that He hurt me quite a bit. I dont know why He wants to do this. It hurts me, as to He was doing the lifestyle because of the girl He was talking to online, and not for U/us. And that He lied to me, looking up toys and what not to get. Just felt like He betrayed me in a way.

He finally broke down and said, im so sorry. He has an addiction to the fantasies of it all. I think it finally got to Him, as He saw in my eyes that He did hurt me a bit and i didnt trust Him for a while. He kept saying sorry and even today He kept doing that. He would be very upset if He lost God's trust and love and even mine. 

Im hoping He can wake up from it and stop this. Im not sure what i can do about this, i guess all i can do is just trust Daddy, and that this will make U/us grow more in the lifestyle and do more of it, with just O/ourselves and what not. 

Sigh i wonder if anyone else has gone through this? I guess that is why im writing this stuff out instead of keeping it inside of myself anymore. And if anyone has gone through this, how did you get through this? Did you stop trusting your Master/Mistress? 

With that, the computer messed up today, had to do a recovery to it, and had to have someone help me at the library. If it wasnt for God this computer wouldnt be up and running now. Maybe this is a warning from God, if Daddy doesnt stop this, He is going to discipline big time. 

Anyways, enough of today. Until next time..
ashpea

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