- I'm 23 now; In the BDSM lifestyle for four- almost five years now. I am a 24/7 slave with a wonderful Daddy/fiancee: who is artcomet.blogspot.com. But as you will see in this blog are the emotions that I go through each and every day- in and out of the lifestyle. This is to show how much I've grown and bonded with my Daddy, how I've dealt with 'the world", and how I dealt with people in the BDSM lifestyle; Enjoy.
May 18, 2013
There is so much i want to say to you
but most of those thoughts get lost into my warped thinking
my inner voice telling me you wont understand me completely if i tell you the things that are hidden within me
telling me you are nothing to anyone, why would he be different?
So many voices tearing my soul apart
each one pulling me in different directions
and not knowing which way to go
which one is right
which one to follow
Your voice calms the fears inside of me
the only voice that can show me which way to go
which way is the correct direction to take
in my life, in my world
your the only voice who has heard me
through my screaming
through my begging to be heard
and you are the only one that completes me in every way
Clarity comes from me knowing that you are my Daddy
in every way of life
I find that you are my soul mate
my confident in this world
and i know without a doubt you are my Daddy
And i know all those doubts inside my heart go away
when im with you
my fears of trust are wiped away
with just a touch
with just a look
with just a sound
with just a word
from Your lips
my heart turns to you
my heart/body/mind listens to you
even when im being a brat and not obeying clearly
deep down, i want your discipline
i want your attention solely on me
i want you to show me the way of my errors
and set me straight
The only thing that is on my mind
is how to please you and make your life comfortable
what my mistake was for getting your ferioucous kisses
your rage and anger that you put into whipping me
how i can be of use to you each and every day.
These thoughts revolve around you
sometimes it is scary, as to i never had this type of love
never felt so connected
so content with someone in my life
With all of these doubts
with all of these fears
and flaws that are in me
i know that you love me for who i am
why you have chosen me and no one else
to be your loving slave
because you see something more in me
something i may not see in myself
and that makes me proud to be your slave.
May 2, 2013
What not to say or ask for in a BDSM community/club.
Searching for a naturally submissive girl, whose limits are to be trully found.
I want someone who belives that her place in this world is to obey, to give pleasure and to be taken care of by another person.
In other words, I want someone who will bend to my will. If I, for example, tell her to dress "x" clothes, she will. If I tell her I want her hair pink instead of black, she will do it. I want to explore her submissive nature and make sure she knows, day after day, hour after hour, that she is owned...and thus, she is now complete.
me:hm i wont try to sound too rude here. But it seems a bit fakish to me. Due to "bending her will" uh that takes time, takes to getting to know the person, and what they want and so forth. Wanting what you want, is part of it, but also what she wants and needs as well. Its not about completing, its about bonding, and the journey as the person above me stated. So much more of this lifestyle than what you stated. Sigh, maybe im just totally different than what "others/most" are. Shakes head
me:Ah much better. Okay, I understand what everyone is putting here. But synard, it came off really artificial as someone put it earlier. That offended a lot of us subs, in every way. Because this lifestyle isnt about playing around, well most of us that is. I understand where you are coming from , hell im tired of trying to find friends in this lifestyle, but i dont put it in that way. No matter what im myself, and dont have to come off sounding plastic, or weird, just to find that right person(s).
I too have met so many people who are fake in this lifestyle,(you will find more fakes than real online more so than anything) and with that, you need to look and see what you want. I mean really want, than just those standards you put. What caught us, is that you want someone to bend to your will, right then and there. Sorry, but if they do that, then you will know that they are fake in the beginning and just mere play acting. What i think most of us are trying to say, is that, you need to build up a relationship, a bond, in the beginning. Talk to the person, get to know them, known their hard/soft limits, what they like, dont like in the lifestyle, and whatever else. You have to see if it meshes you, in order for this lifestyle to ever work out for the long hall. Because i assume that's what you want a LTR? is that it, long term relationship in the lifestyle? Well, you know what i mean. Just like everyone else, you have to weed out the stupid fakes, to find the real ones out there. Take care.
Also something came to me. You said bend to your will. A true sub/slave will kneel without you having to bend it. I think that is what caught us off guard there.
What also amazes me is that so many subs had views like me, and was trying to just set him right, in the way he was wording things, and how we felt. It didnt feel like any other club/room ive been in before, which makes me happy, that there are people out there, who i can be friends with in the lifestyle. :)